Thursday, September 17, 2009

Chem Free since '93!

So I got a phonecall this morning form one of those political pollsters. Perfect. Instead of simply fucking with them the entire phonecall, I decided I had to be gradual, so she wouldn't simply throw out my results. I decided I was going to start out as a moderate, but within a few minutes, alternate the answers of my questions between wildly liberal and fanatically conservative. She got very confused when, at the end she asked about gun control:

Pollster: Do you believe in gun control?
Me: Oh, absolutely, yes, all guns should be controlled by the government.
Pollster: So, you think citizens should be allowed to carry firearms?
Me: Of course not! All citizens should be required to have guns at all times!
Pollster: But you believe in gun control...
Me: Yeah, guns are mean.

ETC.

Daily Discord: Cancel an appointment you didn't have.

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